Psycho Blues
by rgoodfellow
Summary: The Blues Brothers show up for a gig at a strange bar called Lucky's just before the cops.


Just a short story I wrote after watching Blues Brothers 2000. Boy, that was a while ago. Hope you enjoy it!

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* * *

**Psycho-Blues**

"They won't catch us. We're on a mission from God" Elwood Blues. (Blues Brothers)   
  
"You guys keep them busy, I'll kidnap Elwood." Buster Blues (Blues Brothers 2000)   
  
What would happen if the Blues Brothers met the Psycho Six? 

  
  
"So this is Canada huh?" The kid in the back seat of the beat up police cruiser said, looking out the window.   
  
"Yeah," the driver replied, "dis is it." The other two occupants of the car were silent. Possibly they were asleep, but the dark glasses that each of the four people in the car wore, made it impossible to tell. Driving past a railway museum, and a dozen fast food places, the driver of the car pulled up in front of an old brick building.   
  
"Lucky's Bar and Grill," he read the neon sign that hung above the door, "dis is da place." Shaking the other occupants of the car awake, the foursome stepped out of their car, walked to the door marked 'Service Entrance' and knocked.   
  
After a wait of a few minutes, the door was opened by a young woman, maybe 25, wearing an old t-shirt and a pair of jeans that had seen better days. She, like the four men at the door, was wearing a pair of sunglasses. She yawned, and reached under the glasses to rub one eye.   
  
She looked the four men up and down, noticing that while the group consisted of a kid, a black man, a really big guy, and a tall skinny one, they were all dressed alike. Black siuts, white shirts, black ties and fedoras, as well as black shoes and sunglasses. Not only were they dressed alike, but they all stood in the exact same way: looking straight ahead, hands clasped in front. Peering past them, she saw a beat up American style police cruiser in the parking lot.   
  
"Who're you?" she mumbled. It was easy to tell their knocking had woken her up.   
  
The man who had driven the car took a step forward and said, "We're da Blues Brudders Show Band ma'am."   
  
She was awake instantly, "Come on in. I'm glad you showed up, I was afraid we wouldn't have a band for tonight." She lead the group in through a long corridor, and up a flight of steps into what was obviously her living room. A few chairs and a couch stood in the middle of the room, and a kitchen area could be seen off to one side.   
  
The woman curled up at one end of the couch, and motioned for the others to sit. Once they were comfortable, she spoke again.   
  
"I'm Robyn Goodfellow, and I'm in charge around here. Now, what kinda music do you guys play?"   
  
The skinny fellow she had pegged as the leader spoke. "I'm Elwood Blues, dis here is Buster," he pointed at the kid, "Mighty Mac," the big guy, "and Cab. We're da Blues Brudders, and we play the Blues."   
  
"Okay, sounds appropriate, the Blues Brothers play the Blues. So which of you are brothers anyway?"   
  
"All of us. We're all brudders." Robyn looked at them, and even through her sunglasses, Elwood could tell she was trying to see how sincere he was. She shrugged, and accepted that as a fact.   
  
"Alright, you start at 8, that gives you..." she looked at the clock that hung on the wall, "two hours to do anything you think you need to."   
  
"Is there a place around here we can get us some instruments? We uh... lost 'em at the last gig."   
  
"Yeah, c'mon, I'll take you there." She stood up and followed them to their car.   
  
"Nice wheels man." Robyn and Elwood were in front, and the other three climbed in the back as she showed them the way to the nearest place that sold instruments.   
  
They drove along the highway through town, until she said, "There, across the street." She grabbed the dashboard as Elwood threw the car into a spin, pulling it into an empty parking spot on the other side of the street.   
  
"You have got to teach me how to do that!" she breathed as she got out of the car and followed the musicians into the store.

* * *

The beat up black-and-white pulled into the parkinglot at Lucky's an hour later. Spinning around the gravel lot, the car slid in parallel to the building, just far enough from the cinderblock wall to open the door. The door opened, and Robyn stepped out of the driver's seat, as the men in black climbed out. "Thanx Elwood, that was cool!"   
  
"No problem," he said expressionlessly, "C'mon guys, we gotta get the instruments set up." He turned and started piling things out of the trunk of the car.   
  
"Just a question?" Robyn watched as they unloaded enough equipment for a dozen other people.   
  
"Yeah."   
  
"Why so much stuff? I mean, there's only four of you."   
  
"The rest of the band is on it's way."   
  
"The... rest?"   
  
"Yeah, the band," Elwood said just as a grey car pulled into the lot. Looking at it more closely, Robyn realised it had 'The Blues Brothers Band' spray-painted across the side. She watched dumbfounded as eight guys piled out of the little four-door sedan. "Here they are now."   
  
Shrugging her shoulders and laughing a little, Robyn unlocked the Bar and showed them where the stage was. As they set up, she made a few phone calls, telling the regulars that yes, the entertainment had arrived.

* * *

The band had set up all their instruments, and were waiting for things to get rocking. They noticed that even though there didn't seem to be many people coming, Robyn wasn't trying to renegotiate their rates.   
  
"Did Sline tell you anything about this place?" Mac asked Elwood out of the side of his mouth.   
  
"Not really. Just that they liked da blues."   
  
Robyn had introduced them to a couple of people as they came in; a guy named ¨¡t, who was gonna be in charge of their lighting and stuff, a few chicks with Japanese names, and a kid named Fang, who she said was the bouncer tonight. He didn't look big enough to kick anybody's ass, but she seemed to think he could do it. She had also pointed out a couple a other guys who wanted to meet them after the show. A fella' named Duncan, probably her ol' man from the way she looked at him, a guy with short red hair she called Claymore, and a shifty lookin' guy name of Talon. Elwood had him pegged as a fence, he had that 'I can sell you a nice gun' look to 'im. Everybody in the band had noticed that alla Robyn's friends had shades on, just like they did. Elwood just noticed that Buster seemed to be lookin' at her pretty hard.   
  
Just then, Robyn came on stage and introduced them, kinda like Curtis used to in the old days.   
  
"And now, just back from their tour of Asia and South America, the one, the only, Blues Brother's Showband!"   
  
They launched into their opening music sequence, Can't Turn You Loose and Elwood introduced the Band just like he always did. He could feel the music flowing through him, as though he was just a conduit. His heart began to race, and his blood was pounding in his ears as he said the same things he said every time he was on stage: "Hope ya like us," and began to sing as the Band segued into Gimme Some Lovin'

* * *

"...can't you see it?" Robyn slid behind the bar just in time to hear Rei finish asking ¨¡t a question.   
  
"See what?" she asked.   
  
"The Band, especially the lead singer...Elwood, has an amazingly strong aura. I've only ever seen an aura like that when Grandpa channels a spirit. It's beautiful."   
  
¨¡t shrugged his shoulders. "You know I can only see auras when I go onto the astral plane. What about you Glitch," he turned to Robyn, "you can see auras can't you?"   
  
"Yeah, but to me, everything has an aura. The main guys in the band though, the four in black, their auras are the most amazing shade of blue, it's so blue it's...it's... it's blue paisley. I've never seen an aura with a pattern. Except ¨¡t's of course."   
  
¨¡tolus' girlfriend spoke up for the first time, "What do you mean 'Except for ¨¡t's of course'?"   
  
"Well, a patterned aura means that one has been touched in some way by a god. ¨¡t of course is a demigod, which explains that, but..." Robyn's sentence ground to a halt. "¨¡t. Would you look these guys up in the InterPol files please." Her voice was a complete monotone.   
  
"Alright," he was a little confused, but he obliged. He removed his shades, closed his eyes, and went slack for a moment, then he spoke: "Blues, Elwood J. Wanted: kidnapping-2 counts, resisting arrest, public and private property damamge in excess of $1 400 000, driving without a licence, speeding, theft, violating parol... there's a bunch more here. Did you want me to keep reading?"   
  
"What about the others?"   
  
"Blues, Buster, formerly known as Buster Jones. Missing, believed kidnapped by one Blues, Elwood J. similar charges as Elwood. Mac and Cab's records are the same, only shorter."   
  
"K, thanks."   
  
¨¡t put his shades back on, and looked around. He noticed that while the music hadn't stopped, Elwood was making his way to the bar.   
  
"Hey, Robyn?"   
  
"Yeah?"   
  
"Is there a back way outa here?"   
  
"Yeah, why?"   
  
Elwood just tilted his head towards the door. The group at the bar turned and noticed two uniformed Mounties, and an American Police officer talking to Fang at the door.   
  
"No prob. Fang'll keep 'em busy for a while. They can't come in without a search warrant, and if they get violent he'll throw 'em out." Robyn quickly took charge of the situation, "Claymore, you go set something up outside for them..." a huge smile passed over Claymore's face as he stood and walked out the door past the cops. "¨¡t, you deal with their records. If you can't erase them cut 'em down so they're not worth going after, and don't forget to make Cab Buster's legal guardian," Once again ¨¡tolus went into his meditation ruse.   
  
Robyn pulled Elwood back onto the stage just as Fang was forced to bodily remove the policemen into the street. Elwood was shocked at how easily he managed to take down all three men, although of course the emotion never registered on his face. As the song ended, Robyn took over the stage and began to speak.   
  
"Okay everybody. Wasn't that great blues music?"   
  
The small crowd gave an overwhelming 'YES!'   
  
"Well, the cops are after 'em, so let's see if we can't help out a bit ok?"   
  
As she led the band offstage, Elwood noticed a young blond man in a black trench pull out a badge and walk towards the door. A set of huge twins were right behind him, and a guy in one of those red Dudley DoRight outfits was following them, a huge dog at his heels.

* * *

"You guys are always welcome here." Robyn said to Elwood as she handed him his money and a card with the bar's number on it. "Just let us know when you'll be comin' back ok?"   
  
"It'll probably be a helluva long time before that happens." Buster said. He looked kind of unhappy about it.   
  
"Hey kid," ¨¡t said, "everybody that Robyn wants to come back, does eventually. She's just lucky that way."   
  
Robyn spoke up again, "You'll have a while to get away. We've got a couple of distractions set up." she ushered them out the door into the back parking lot. As the group moved through the door, an explosion set the glasses in the Bar rattling. Stepping into the lot, the band noticed a pair of police cars flanking their old cruiser.   
  
The first, an unmarked American police unit was crackling merrily away, flames licking through the windows and around the hood. It seemed that was the source of the explosion they had heard moments earlier. The other, an RCMP cruiser, was flanked by the two bodybuilding twins Elwood had seen in the bar. The car itself was rotating in slow circles, gravel crunching as it spun slowly in its upsidedown position.   
  
The officers were being held at bay by two growling animals,   
  
"Wow," Buster was entranced, "are those wolves?"   
  
"Yeah kid, those are wolves," ¨¡t replied.   
  
"I didn't think they came into towns. Why is one bigger than the other?"   
  
"These are special circumstances. And they're two different kinds of wolves."   
  
"Oh, like, one's a timber wolf, and the other isn't?"   
  
"Yeah...something like that."   
  
The wolves sat calmly on their haunches, paying no attention to one another. Their eyes were locked on the three policemen. They made no sound except when the men attempted to move from their spot. Then, lips curled back from white teeth that glistened in the glow coming from the streetlights. The man in the red Mountie uniform stood behind the two animals, calmly explaining the situation.   
  
"I'm sorry gentlemen, but there's no way I can call them off. In the first place, Deifenbaker is deaf, and he quite likes the blues, so he wouldn't follow my instructions even if he could hear them. Secondly, the other wolf here only listens to who he wants to listen to, and I am not one of those people. Not to mention the fact that those men have commited no crimes, and I cannot let you arrest them without just cause."   
  
Elwood couldn't see the blond guy with the trenchcoat, but the way the cops kept lookin' up, he figured that the guy had to be on a rooftop somewhere. He probably had a gun too.   
  
"Who are dese guys ma'am?" He looked at Robyn, expressionless as always.   
  
"Blues lovers." She grinned.   
  
"And?"   
  
"And cops from here and the states." She said.   
  
"Dey're helpin' us out, just 'cause they like da blues?" Elwood was showing as much expression as Buster had ever seen.   
  
"Yeah, and 'cause they're my friends. Don't worry, as long as you get outta here now, they won't be able to touch you. You don't have records anymore."   
  
"Whaddya mean?"   
  
"Please, don't ask, just go!"   
  
"Ok Ma'am. Tank's alot."   
  
"Thank me by coming back and playing another gig Elwood."   
  
"Yes'm."   
  
The cops were still paying more attention to the rooftop and the wolves than to the Blues' so the band began to pile into their cars.   
  
"Hey Buster," Robyn beckoned him over.   
  
"Yeah?"   
  
"Next time, don't stare so hard ok?" She laughed and kissed him on the cheek.   
  
"Y-yes ma'am!"   
  
As the last of the Band piled into the cars, the doors slammed, and they slowly started towards the road. The regulers from Lucky's cheered as they drove past the pinned policemen, waving and yelling for them to come back again soon.

* * *

"Canada's pretty cool Elwood." Buster sat in the front seat looking back towards the bar.   
  
"Yeah kid. It's preddy darn cool." Elwood kept his eyes on the road.   
  
"So, we'll be coming back here... right?" Buster sounded hopeful.   
  
"Yeah. Someday. Hey Cab?"   
  
"Yes Elwood?"   
  
"How could dey erase our records?"

**_Fin_**

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For original stories starring the gang at Lucky's check out http:www.psychosix.com

Hope you enjoyed my story! --Robs


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